Ok, so we just got off the phone with our investor.
Full disclosure: I love our investors even when I’m being obstinate or they’re being a pain in my ass.
I wish people would be less afraid of their investors. Fear makes you do weird things. Heavy dose of respect - yes. Duty to do right by your shareholders - always. Fear - no.
Talking with your investor(s) can be a dance.
Today’s musing is about talking with your investor about profitable growth. IMHO this is happening at most start ups these days.
Our call today was on paid marketing ROI.
When your investor asks for a call on paid marketing ROI it is a polite way of saying “what the fuck are you doing with my money?”
(Same goes for repeated emails about headcount)
When you get these it’s best not to get into a knife fight (incessant email responses, questions and answers that only beget more questions and answers) nor to bring your knife to a gunfight (aka debating it in some godforsaken terminal corridor at JFK).
The best approach is to frame up the problem for you both in a way that allows you to productively talk about it (Hey, I am really concerned about costs & my sense is you are too. Here’s how I’m going about managing them…) and provide a holistic solution (Here’s my approach A B C D blah blah blah) and also the risks associated.
Don’t bluff everything you don’t know (obv you always have to bluff some stuff).
Be vulnerable. Ask for advice and perspective. Earn their trust as you go on this ride.
Do what you say you’re going to do. Don’t chicken out at the last minute.
This is an art not a science.
Ok, so back to our paid marketing ROI call.
Obviously this call happens after an investor changes out of his quarter-zip, then stays up all night tossing and turning saying to himself, “those morons I know they’re burning cash”
Investors are a wiley breed for a few reasons.
One, you have their money which makes them suspicious of you yet also in a position where they need to root for you. No matter how irritated they are, they still have to say nice things about you to their friends.
Two, they’re usually good at math - and fast at it. Probably better and faster than you. If they’re not A+ at math then they have these little computers running around called analysts and those people are definitely better and faster than you at math.
Plus these computers are super charged. They’ve spent all day all hopped up on Zyn, their eyes bleeding after running 4,000 scenarios about how you are going to get it right or utterly fuck it up. They know you better than you do.